It takes time for kids to learn to look up and see the needs of those around them, including their parents and siblings. They're very naturally attuned to their own needs, but need to be shown how to "see a need, meet a need" for others. One of the best ways to teach them this is to model it out loud. Be intentional to point out the needs of others around you - narrating aloud the things you might naturally do in silence. In a waiting area or lobby, I have taught my boys to only take a seat if there is not an adult standing and waiting. They should take notice if "elders" enter, and quickly offer their seats. While grocery shopping, I point out, "See that woman struggling to reach the top shelf? Is there a way we could help her?".... "See that older man loading those heavy fertilizer bags into his truck. Is there a way we could help him?"... "See that pregnant woman putting her groceries away? Is there a way we could help her?"... When they were younger, I'd whisper the the words they could use, "Excuse me, may I return that shopping cart for you?" This trains them to pay attention to the world around them and look for ways to be helpers. It is a practice that not only helps them build confidence speaking to strangers, but translates to empathy and a spirit of teamwork in the workplace and beyond. The strongest teams - at work, in sports, and in families - are those whose members are willing to bear one another's burdens. I often have to voice my needs to my kids and ask how they could help. I wish they'd notice on their own, but that takes time. Soon, they won't need our prompting. It will become habit. When one of your kids helps to meet a need, ask them how it feels. That intrinsic feeling of satisfaction and service will motivate them to do it much more often on their own. #HRmom
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